Royal Blue

Thoughts of a writer, wife, mother, PhD, sister, crafty chick, program coordinator, homeowner, culture vulture, bibliophile, and blogger.
Thursday, November 06, 2003
Excuse Me While I Scream

Our realtor told us that potential buyers toured our house yesterday and but felt it was overpriced because the kitchen was not totally new. Well, make an offer, then!
We're desperate!

My guess is that they aren't really interested in the house and the kitchen was just one of the reasons. That's fine. I understand.

However, I'm starting to feel a bit panicky about the house being shown and no offers so far. Granted, it's only been 2 weeks, but the average time on the market for our area of town is 39 days and so I'm anxious about it. Additionally, the "realtor lore" is that nobody buys a house during the holidays.

On the upside, my aunt's partner is taking good care of it in our absence and raking leaves, fixing burned out lights, etc. What a godsend she is.

In every difficult life situation there is a lesson or learning opportunity, right? Well, the lesson I'm taking away from this is DON'T take your house off the market until you are walking into the title office to close the deal.

We wasted 7 weeks while Jeffrey tried to get his financing in order to buy the house. Yes, he did pay for the October mortgage, but he can't pay for the lost weeks when the house was not on the market and we could have been getting "back up" buyers.

Sigh. Scream. Curse. Then live and learn. I'm trying, anyway.

Wednesday, November 05, 2003
Weight Watchers, Again

Tomorrow I start a new Weight Watchers at Work program again. The one I started in Sept. failed miserably because I had so many work commitments that conflicted Thursdays at noon.

But, I've cleared my calendar for the next 3 months for Thursdays at noon (except for the one when we will be in Florida next month with my family) so I can get back on the wagon.

I'm really just about 15 lbs. from my pre-pregnancy weight.
It feels realistic to tackle this in 3 months, even though it will be over the holidays!! Yikes!

After my last pregnancy, it took me 9 mos. of Weight Watchers to lose 25 lbs, but I did it! I must remember that!

I need the accountability of getting on the scale every week and having my gains or losses entered into my little book. Otherwise, I'm just not disciplined enough to lose on my own.

Now, the real question is when will I start exercising again? I'm so ready to start a new routine.

The women I work with are great role models--several of them keep running shoes in the office and walk around the river trail behind our building every day.

I gotta get with the program. Soon.
Mothers & Writing

I realize it's been awhile since I've posted about my literary life. Yesterday I was introduced to, a new site devoted to mama-centric writing of many types.

Very cool.

I have already queried them about writing some book reviews. I would LOVE to write some extended essays for them, but that isn't realistic right now. They have asked me to send them some of my writing samples.

In August, I wrote an encyclopedia entry on Maya Angelou for a new series by Greenwood Press called "Encyclopedia of Women's Autobiography" or something like that. Writing and submitting that entry just about killed me since I had sooo much else going on that month, but I am glad I did it. Plus, a lot of the text was from my dissertation so it was not that difficult to pull it together.

I also have a book review published this fall in the journal of the Association for Research on Mothering.

I hope I can publish at least 2-3 pieces (newspaper/online/magazine/whatever) per year. That would make me feel like I haven't lost touch with my writerly self.

Writing comes so easily to me and is so enjoyable for me that I just don't want to give that up. I do need to start using my middle initial in my byline, though. In our last city, there was another woman with my first and last name listed in the phone book. Freaked me out. My name is really not that common.

In fact, a guy I went to elementary and junior high school with found me on the Internet this week and emailed me! What a blast from the past! I haven't seen him since 1979, so it was a bit surreal but really nice that I was not forgotten!

Monday, November 03, 2003
All In Good Time

We met with the nannies last night and they are going to start taking care of Sean and Ethan next week. It will be 3 days a week (and 2 days at the regular daycare) until mid-December, when it becomes full-time nanny care.

Jodi and I are both relieved. With Ethan and Sean both sick right now with the colds they picked up at their respective daycares, we are feeling more than ever that they will do better in a two babies-one caregiver situation at our house or Jodi and Michael's house.

Lindsay and Bree seem excited about the prospect of the job, which is a relief to me. It will cost us a bit more each week, but it is well worth it. I'm relieved.

Sean's daycare situation, while having several bright spots, was nagging at me. I wanted to find something better. Now the only other nag I have is the sale of our old house. Our realtor had an open house yesterday and had some mild interest, but no real leads. It's depressing. Writing that second mortgage check last week was painful to say the least. I don't want to see our savings account drain away on this. I'm worried but I try not to let it dominate my thoughts because my ability to do something about it is limited.

Halloween was a good time--Molly loved her clown costume and i have to admit that I was pleased that she didn't want to be something more traditionally feminine like a princess. But, I suppose that may--and probably will--change over the years. Last week she was fascinated and charmed by her Pull-Ups that had pictures of Sleeping Beauty and Snow White on them.

At the same time, I have always been a "girly girl" type and an ardent feminist, so it shouldn't bother me too much that she is starting to get into traditionally feminine toys and images. As long as we keep the lines of communication open and Ed and I become conscious of how we discuss ideas/images with her and present them to her.

This summer she loved the book "Are You My Mother?" about a baby bird searching for his mother. In the end, they are reunited in the bird nest and Molly asked several times at the end of the book: "Where's the Daddy?" and I, like a dope, said "At work." I said it because I knew it was something she would understand.

What I should have taken the time to explain was that some families have a mom and kid(s) and some have a mommy and daddy and kids, etc. etc. I kick myself that I took the simple (and narrow) way out of that conversation without thinking about it.

She's almost 3 years old and understands and retains a lot more than I realize sometimes. It's the perfect time to start talking with her about the world and its complexities--as much as a 3-year-old can understand.

I did a LOT of reading about infancy and babies and sleep issues and such but now it's time to understand more about raising a preschooler. Ed and I will both benefit from reading and talking about what we do with Molly and why we do it.

At least I don't have to worry about us agreeing on these types of things--we've always been on the same page in terms of parenting philosophies.

Someone once told me that babies demand a lot from you physically, but as they get older, children's needs require more emotional and psychological energy and commitment. Oh, it's so true. I want to make sure that we bring all of our "selves" to the task..


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